Tag: Life Coaching

Learn About Personal Peace and Live It…

5^th April 2021

“Personal Peace” is an article aimed at enlightening you about its essence, the techniques to achieve it, and its importance in establishing a serene personal environment. Peace of mind is advantageous, yet the challenge is how to attain it. Bearing this in mind, let us address it head-on.

WHAT IS PERSONAL PEACE?

Personal peace, often termed intrapersonal peace or inner peace, signifies harmony within oneself. It involves accepting oneself as is, regardless of external appearance or internal thoughts about one’s spirit, soul, and body. This acceptance typically stems from a profound and improved self-understanding.

Self-discovery is a crucial component of achieving genuine personal peace. It isn’t about aspiring to be someone else but rather embracing and exploring the unique qualities and personality traits that constitute your individuality. These are the attributes that distinguish you from others.

In many African societies, where socialism prevails, self-exploration may not be widely promoted. Dr. John Mbiti’s phrase, “I am because we are,” reflects the Zulu concept of ubuntu, which, despite its many positive aspects, appears to overlook personal development.

Related: Life Coaching Ultimate Guide

We often find ourselves adrift in the vast sea of people’s perceptions and ideas about the world and ourselves. The views and words of our parents, siblings, friends, co-workers, and colleagues seem to shape our identity. But pause for a moment—can they always be correct? Is there a chance that their perspectives might be flawed?

HOW CAN YOU FIND PERSONAL PEACE?

To find the personal peace in question, one must first embark on a journey of self-discovery. Identifying who you truly are is a crucial step. Reading articles on self-discovery can be immensely beneficial in this process.

Self-discovery

Self-discovery is a unique process, a journey that might be embarked upon only once in a lifetime. It differs from self-improvement, which can continue throughout one’s life. While the opinions of others can be valuable in the journey of self-discovery, it is important to remember that you understand yourself more profoundly than anyone else, even your parents.

Self-improvement

Self-discovery leads to self-improvement, both of which constitute personal development. This is predicated on the notion that you can only develop, improve, or grow what already exists. Such improvement encompasses learning to live in peace with oneself, which is the central theme of this article.

A deeper understanding of oneself can also enhance comprehension of others, contributing significantly to one’s personal peace. Recognizing that anger is not a solution enables one to live harmoniously with oneself and others. Thus, self-improvement is a journey towards achieving peace with oneself and fostering peaceful relationships with others, underscoring that understanding is the cornerstone of a peaceful existence.

HOW DID I FIND PERSONAL PEACE?

Now, you might be curious about my personal methods. Beyond the techniques mentioned earlier, are there additional approaches to achieving a peaceful life? Indeed, there are. You might discover your own methods to strive for peace despite the prevalence of violence in our world.

Avoiding conflict

This is an innate mechanism for me, a practice I’ve been automatically employing since the 1980s to maintain a sense of personal peace. This technique is not simple, and thus might not be suitable for everyone. Each of us is unique, and what serves me well may not have the same effect on others. It could work for you, or it might not, as you are unique and special in your own way. However, one method I use to achieve inner peace is by avoiding conflicts.

Repentance

If I cannot avoid conflict entirely, another strategy that works for me is to apologize. This means I am the first to say “I’m sorry” or ask for forgiveness, even if I believe I am right. It’s about resolving the conflict, not denying the facts.

Persisting in an argument when success is unattainable seems foolish to me. For some individuals, no matter how well you articulate your position, they will not understand. The more you attempt to justify yourself, the more agitated they become. Therefore, yielding is sometimes the best option for peace.

Quitting isn’t always indicative of failure, despite the common belief that quitters never win. This adage isn’t universally applicable. There are times when quitting is necessary to succeed. In places like South Sudan, where the culture celebrates warriors and victors, not victims, this can be seen as cowardice. Surrendering doesn’t come naturally to everyone, but for some of us, it’s an instinctive choice.

Withdrawal

For me, the final measure to achieve personal peace is to distance myself from the source of disturbance. Sometimes, this may involve not engaging in conversation or listening to the other party temporarily, allowing me to recuperate and restore my happiness and peace.

Humans are intricate creatures, and changing them is not feasible, particularly those with inflexible personalities. Some individuals have such set mindsets that they struggle to adapt to new circumstances, complicating peaceful coexistence.

Yet, by blocking out such individuals, I can find tranquility. These people, however, are not without value; they facilitate my adaptation. They remind me that not everyone shares my perspective, nor is there a requirement for them to do so, broadening my understanding of human nature.

The Bible mentions that Jesus was aware of what lies within all individuals. He understood that people’s attitudes could swiftly shift from praise to insult, from blessing to cursing.

YOUR PERSONAL CHOICE

You now face a personal decision. You likely understand how to achieve and sustain your inner peace. What I’ve shared encompasses common knowledge and my own experiences. Similarly, you have your own voice.

You may agree or disagree with some of my earlier points. This signifies that personal freedom is a principle I carry with me at all times. I consider myself free, as I presume everyone else to be. I have the liberty to think differently from the majority. I believe that understanding ourselves on a personal level is the key to understanding those around us.

Society’s definition of me does not shape my self-identity, except when it coincides with the truth. However, you might see things differently. You’re at liberty to compare your views with mine. After all, they are your views. So, what is your opinion? Does society define who you are? Why or why not?

MY FINAL WORDS

In conclusion, these are my words of wisdom for you. Balance is necessary in all aspects of life, contributing to personal peace through various internal and external factors. We should not dismiss sound advice simply because it unsettles us or provokes anger at times.

Here is my final counsel: remain adaptable. Embrace listening, learning, and authenticity. These aren’t strict commandments, as that would be contradictory. I believe no one can be compelled to act against their will, nor should they be. However, it is wise to consider good advice.

Those who offer you sound advice do so out of love and concern. Yet, we must not depend excessively on the opinions, words, or actions of others to the point where we lose touch with our true selves. Personal peace is achieved by discovering and enhancing your true self.

I trust this article has been beneficial to you. If it has, feel free to express your thoughts in the comment section below. You may also use the WhatsApp button to reach out to me for a more personal discussion. God bless you. Shalom!

FURTHER READINGS

• Cultivating Personal peace—The Peace Alliance.
• What Is Inner Peace?—Success Consciousness.

Learning these top 10 life coaching skills will save you from low self-esteem

15^th March 2021

“The Top 10 Life Coaching Skills” is an article designed to empower you with the skills used by exceptional coaches for self-coaching. These skills and techniques can enhance your self-awareness and development. Self-esteem pertains to your self-perception and self-worth. It’s crucial to value yourself, as this influences how others perceive you. Now, let’s examine the facts presented below.

Skill #1: Confidentiality Skills

Experts assert that maintaining confidentiality with life coaching clients is one of the most valuable skills for life coaches. But how can these skills be applied to self-coaching? Indeed, self-coaching is possible, and that’s likely why you’re reading this article. You’re eager to discover and utilize the top 10 life coaching skills, whether you’re a coach or someone seeking coaching.

Confidentiality is a skill that everyone needs, though not always. Just as positive events don’t always occur, confidence can fluctuate. However, the general consensus is that confidentiality is beneficial and should be embraced and utilized as much as possible.

As a life coach, maintaining confidentiality with your clients’ statements is crucial. Think of it as being a medical doctor in your own right. Medical professionals are expected not to disclose their clients’ private matters. Similarly, even if you were my spouse, your doctor would not share certain details about you unless absolutely necessary.

Likewise, life coaches and pastors should conduct themselves professionally. We are all human, and sometimes things may inadvertently be said. It’s often mentioned that about 95% of human conversation is gossip, which is even supported by my Bible. However, professionalism is key. The most effective way to be professional is to keep confidential matters exactly that—confidential. This means not sharing them with anyone, not even your spouse.

Related: Life Coaching Ultimate Guide

Skill #2: Objectivity Skills

There is a significant difference between objective and subjective thinking. To simplify, the individual you are conversing with is not the topic of discussion; rather, it is the situation they are presenting to you. Maintaining objectivity in counseling or life coaching is essential.

But how can you maintain this objectivity when you are reflecting and speaking to yourself? It’s interesting to note that you are essentially coaching yourself all the time. Indeed, this happens whether you are advising someone else or during your leisure time. In reality, our internal dialogue continues even while we sleep!

Skill #3: Supporting and Firm Skills

Life coaching is a complex skill that involves supporting clients’ ideas while also adhering to the facts, even if it means acknowledging that their perspective might be flawed. Our role is to back the client unconditionally, without imposing our own beliefs, yet not capitulating to theirs. Thoughts and words are actions in their respective realms, so we must bolster the client while standing firm on the factual aspects of their situation, which adds to the challenge of being a life coach.

When it comes to self-coaching, the same principles apply. You might believe that you are worthless, akin to feeling like ‘just that pig.’ However, while you might feel useless at times, it’s not a constant state, is it?

Skill #4: Knowing Yourself as a Life Coach

This seems self-explanatory, doesn’t it? To know oneself as a life coach means recognizing that you are also a human with beliefs, flaws, and issues that your client may share. You might be grappling with the same challenges as your client.

However, you must not disclose this, or you cease to be a coach. Honesty is crucial, but it should come at a point when you and your client have gained a deeper understanding of each other.

So, how do you apply these skills to self-coaching? Acknowledge that you are not perfect, just as no human is. This doesn’t mean we lack valid points; on the contrary, we understand that facing the truth is beneficial to us on a personal level.

Skill #5: Learning Willingly

Being open to learning, even from your clients, is crucial to becoming the best life coach you aspire to be. You don’t need to inform them that you are also being coached. However, it’s important to continually learn, including from other coaches.

Having a life coach or a spiritual leader to guide you is beneficial. For instance, I find inspiration in Jesus and biblical figures like Paul, drawing lessons from their lives.

Many read the Bible as a religious text due to tradition. Instead, try reading it as if it were a compelling work of fiction to gain new insights. It can serve as an excellent life coach.

The Bible conveys to me that I am significant to God, that I possess what I need, and that I am capable of achieving anything. These affirmations are powerful tools for self-discovery and professional development, regardless of one’s faith.

Focusing on understanding our abilities, possessions, and identities is key. We all have these attributes in various forms, and exploring them further means learning more about ourselves.

Skill #6: Never Become Judgmental

This isn’t a commandment to adhere to, right? No, it isn’t. That’s not the intention of the communicator here. However, the point should be clear. It’s another way of stating that we must remain objective rather than subjective when providing life coaching to our clients.

How can you apply these skills when coaching yourself? By remembering that you, too, are a person with mistakes and flaws, as all humans inherently are.

Cats behave according to their nature because they are cats. Dogs, doves, ravens, and all other animals have their unique lifestyles, just as we humans do. This means we shouldn’t be judgmental, even though it often seems to be the default.

Skill #7: Listening Skills

Number seven in the top ten life coaching skills is listening. Many expert life coaches emphasize the importance of having ‘big ears and small mouths,’ meaning we should listen more and talk less. In practice, this means letting the client speak while we listen. However, the challenge arises when we find ourselves talking internally or externally, as it’s natural to want to converse. The advice from experts is not to rush; we should listen attentively to our clients and only speak when they invite us to or when it’s the appropriate time to contribute. Applying these listening techniques to self-coaching involves speaking about the issue or oneself and then pausing to reflect before proposing any potential solutions.

Skill #8: It’s Not All Your Responsibility

In dealing with your client’s life, it’s not solely your responsibility to absorb all their pain and seek immediate relief. Your role is to steer the client toward a potential solution, allowing them to discover it on their own. You are a guide, not an imposer of solutions; otherwise, the client may feel patronized.

It’s important to empathize with the situation, yet not shoulder all the responsibility. Encourage the client to think, speak, and decide on their next steps independently. Let the clients take ownership, not you. Your task is to lead them to their own solutions.

As a coach, apply this to yourself by sometimes stepping back and letting life unfold. Pursue what your heart desires and observe what happens. This acknowledges that we’re not always in control, even of our own lives.

Skill #9: Flexibility

Flexibility in life is a skill derived from both innate tendencies and learned behavior. While not everyone possesses this skill naturally, it is possible for anyone to develop it. Flexibility prevents one from becoming entrenched in certain areas with clients, where the role is to guide rather than to enforce agreements.

This implies that while one must be empathetic towards the challenges others face, it is also necessary to adapt while remaining true to oneself. Being flexible does not equate to being indifferent or negligent; rather, it involves recognizing that not all situations have clear solutions.

Indeed, not every problem in life has a definitive resolution. This is exemplified by the inevitability of death, which, despite our wishes, remains a part of life.

Flexibility is intertwined with knowledge and an understanding of life’s complexities. Those who are flexible, often referred to as liberals, avoid becoming fixated on a single perspective, belief, teaching, doctrine, or practice. They acknowledge that approaches that work at one time may not be effective under different circumstances, for various reasons.

Skill #10: Visualization Skills

To keep dreaming means to remain thoughtful and proactive. This isn’t about daydreaming; rather, it’s about engaging your mind while listening to your client. As you anticipate your turn, continue to explore and learn. This approach to learning involves visualizing the world and various scenarios, allowing you to momentarily step out of your client’s perspective to gain a broader understanding of their situation.

By seeing beyond what your client communicates, you can guide them professionally without bias or excessive sympathy, which might otherwise lead you to become ensnared in their desperate thought patterns. Remember, you are the coach at this moment, despite facing your own personal challenges.

My Final Words

As we conclude this post on life coaching skills, consider what insights you can apply from the ten points discussed. Remember, knowledge only becomes power when it’s put into action. Napoleon Hill articulated this truth years ago, and it remains just as valid today. If you’ve found value in this post, feel free to share your thoughts in the comments. Should you have suggestions for improvement, please don’t hesitate to mention them. Wishing you safety and blessings during and beyond the pandemic. Peace!

FURTHER READINGS

• Life Coaching Skills Certification—Udemy
• What Is Life Coaching?—Skills You Need
• Coaching Podcast: The #1 Most Important Coaching Skill Is—JRNI

Mastering The Discover Yourself Tips Will Help You Discover Your Identity Super Fast

22^nd February 2021

“Discover Yourself” is an article designed to assist you in understanding the concept of self-discovery amidst a multitude of people. In Africa, we reside in a socialist society where the individual identity often remains obscured. However, you possess an identity that extends beyond mere biometric data like fingerprints. Let’s delve deeper into this subject.

WHAT IS SELF DISCOVERY?

Self-Discovery, as I define it in my writings, is akin to what others might call personal development or growth. However, one cannot develop what does not yet exist. That’s why, before we advance personally or professionally, we must first uncover our natural selves.

Self-discovery involves exploring what’s already present within us, which is vastly different from aspiring to be someone we’re not—a goal that’s certainly unattainable. This is a common misunderstanding among parents who often wish their children to mirror themselves.

Yet, a child is not a replica of their parent. They will never become their parent. Each child is distinct and differs from their parents in countless ways. Even if children bear a striking resemblance to their parents, it doesn’t guarantee they will share the same likes, dislikes, or passions.

In light of this, we can assert that self-discovery is the journey of unveiling one’s authentic self, which often contradicts others’ perceptions. Discovering one’s true self in this world requires time, dedication, experimentation, and mistakes, but it is indeed achievable.

Related: Life Coaching Category

HOW DO WE DISCOVER OURSELVES?

How do we embark on the journey of self-discovery? There are numerous techniques for this personal quest. Not all methods will resonate with everyone, which is why I will share how I uncovered my true self.

Before proceeding, it’s important to clarify that self-discovery is not a repetitive process that persists throughout life. Contrary to the belief that it’s a lifelong journey, self-discovery occurs definitively. What continues for a lifetime is what I refer to as self-improvement.

We consistently enhance our discovered selves until our time on this earth concludes, but the act of discovering who we are happens just once.

Thinking

One way to discover your true self is to think about yourself. This technique helps you find out what you love the most in this world. Research shows that all sane humans know who they are from the inside out. They know themselves more than anyone else.

This is the reason why we sometimes remind others that if they are not careful with us we will teach them a lesson. We want to tell the world that we are kinds of people they never know yet. This means we know our inner intentions. We know our thoughts, words, and deeds.

Asking

Another technique for self-discovery, as suggested by experts, is to seek other people’s opinions about oneself. It’s important to remember that self-discovery can sometimes overlap with career discovery, even though they may seem distinct and unique.

Asking others for their perspective on you might not be effective for everyone in the journey of self-discovery. This is due to the possibility that people, particularly those who have known you for a long time, may hold incorrect assumptions about you.

Understanding my children individually is my responsibility. However, we often miss the mark because humans are intricate beings that are challenging to fully comprehend. It’s possible to understand someone more than they understand themselves.

Given the complexity of human nature, I believe that you are the best person to explore your own identity thoroughly. You know yourself, or at least you should know yourself better than anyone else, God excepted.

HOW DID I DISCOVERY MYSELF?

I understand you might be curious. I am prepared to share how I uncovered my true self. This revelation should not be confused with religion, as I do not consider myself religious in any conventional sense.

My Past

Reflection serves as a tool for me to discern who I am by considering who I was the day before. It’s a fundamental aspect of my journey to self-discovery. By examining my past, I understand who I am now, rather than who I aspire to be in the future. I delve into my history to review my thoughts, words, and actions.

My previous thoughts, expressions, and actions reveal my current identity. These are my footprints, akin to how modern humans study ancient animal fossils to learn about bygone eras. This method shifts my focus from the realm of desires to the reality of my history.

I recognize that circumstances invariably shape our thoughts, speech, and behavior. However, when I reflect on my past, I uncover the authentic version of myself. Despite the various changes that life events bring about within me, one element remains unchanged: PEACE.

My Present

Now, a simple technique I’ve discovered is to reflect on my present life after considering my past. This advances my self-discovery to encompass the thoughts, words, and actions that define my current state. This process is not about yearning to be a different version of myself. Often, I realize, much like Paul, that my actions diverge from my desires.

This realization is a powerful tool in understanding who I am. Acknowledging my strengths and weaknesses is a true exploration of my current self, not who I was. It reveals that certain aspects of myself remain unchanged, despite my desires to alter them. My religion may deem my preferences as wrong, but my heart disagrees. This is my authentic self, not the identity imposed by societal expectations or desires.

Embracing this openness allows me to delve into my inner self. It’s an honest introspection, untainted by wishful thinking, for I do not aspire to be; I simply am.

My Future

Reflecting on my past and present, I envision my future self. This is not about desiring to be someone else; it’s about recognizing the continuity of my identity over time. I have been, am, and will continue to be the same person.

Consider this: if I have loved people in the past and continue to do so today, it’s likely that I will love them in the future because it’s an intrinsic part of who I am. My love for women, for instance, is a genuine aspect of my being. Denying this would not alter the inherent truth of my affection. Not all men are inclined to love women, and that’s perfectly natural.

This illustrates why judging individuals based on popular opinion can be problematic. Take, for instance, the church’s historical stance on marriage, which may have pressured individuals to live in ways contrary to their nature.

Jesus taught His disciples that the choice to marry or remain single is a natural one. Understanding this can lead to self-discovery. The Creator, knowing the hearts of men and women, did not explicitly endorse or denounce polygamy, recognizing it as a personal decision that does not impact one’s spiritual salvation.

Your Personal Choice

You possess a mind, a wellspring of knowledge and experience. This grants you the power of choice, a freedom no external force, not even a divine one, can take away. You are a unique individual with the capacity for both good and evil. The path you take is yours alone to decide.

Asking God

I believe that God knows each of us thoroughly, and the ultimate way I’ve found to discover my true self is to seek God’s guidance. My belief in God is unwavering, as I am certain of His existence. This conviction is not about religious practice; it’s about spirituality.

God communicates with us constantly. He speaks through our spirits, through others, through the Bible, and also through dreams and visions.

When I inquire of God about my identity, He imparts thoughts that respond to my inquiries. This method can aid you in self-discovery as well. The Bible contains numerous verses that affirm our existence is intentional.

While these verses were not penned directly to me, they serve as a guide in understanding God’s vision for my life. They are particularly resonant when they align with my innate qualities.

MY FINAL WORDS

In conclusion, here are my thoughts. Balance is necessary in all aspects, and this is where the final value of the five, openness, becomes essential. This content is not a doctrinal manual dictating what you must or must not do. Rather, it’s information for you to consider and make an informed choice about which self-discovery techniques to employ.

If you enjoyed this article (‘Discover Yourself’), please leave a comment below. You can also use the WhatsApp button to connect with me directly and start a conversation. However, to share your insights with others, kindly leave a comment or distribute the article on social media using the share buttons provided. I deeply appreciate your support and thank you for reading my articles. Peace!

Further Readings

• Quotes About Finding Yourself—Keep in Spring
• Discover Yourself Quotes—Quora
• 6 Steps to Discover Your True Self—Success

Learning simple techniques on overcoming anger for personal anger management

15^th February 2021

“Overcoming Anger” is an article designed to assist you in enhancing your self-awareness through simple, actionable steps. This article will guide you on how to manage your anger, whether it’s directed at yourself or others. With that introduction, let’s begin.

WHAT IS ANGER?

Anger is a natural and normal emotion experienced by all animals at some point. However, when anger becomes problematic, we must address it. But how? This article aims to explore that question.

Overcoming anger is challenging but achievable. While preventing it is impractical, as we coexist with others, finding ways to manage or control it is possible, which is the focus of this article.

Much has been said and written on this subject, yet I believe something remains unaddressed, prompting the creation of this article. The methods I’ve employed here may be unconventional and scarce, but they promise significant results when applied properly.

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ANGER?

Anger is only detrimental when it becomes excessive or abnormal. As the saying goes, “too much of anything is not good.” Indeed, when anger turns into something uncontrollable, it becomes a problem that needs to be addressed, and reaching that extreme in anger is inadvisable.

Often, anger arises unexpectedly, making it challenging to maintain at a manageable level. Before we realize it, we have reached the height of anger. In essence, anger is problematic when it escapes our control, thereby dominating us instead of being managed by us.

Related: Life Coaching Category

HOW CAN YOU OVERCOME ANGER?

Here are some strategies to help you manage anger before it controls you. The initial tips are from various experts, which I will present before sharing my own experiences. As mentioned earlier, although managing anger can be challenging, it is definitely achievable. Every individual has unique methods for handling anger.

Understand anger

One of the initial strategies to overcome anger is to comprehend it. By fully understanding anger, you are more inclined to ignore or avoid it. Recognize that anger is a natural response not only in humans but also in other animals, including birds, fish, reptiles, and insects.

Relaxing

Another approach is to relax before proceeding further. This involves doing something physically different rather than reacting negatively towards the person or situation causing anger. Experts recommend taking a deep breath at this point to calm your entire body.

Individuals can find various personal ways to relax, which may vary from one person to another. The method I use to relax might not be universally applicable, but the key concept is to find relaxation.

Professionals also suggest speaking soothing words to oneself slowly or engaging in yoga exercises to ease the mind and relax the body. This is another method to manage anger that I have not personally tried, but is recommended by some experts.

Changing your mind

While I don’t think any of us can truly change our minds, this is a technique some people use to overcome anger. They manage to convince themselves to think differently in the moment, changing the subject in their minds, and for some, this approach is effective.

Better communication

Some people think that anger can prevent individuals from communicating factually. To counter this, one technique is to calm down, which can lead to improved communication. Effective communication is impossible without active listening, so it’s important to listen attentively when the other person is expressing their grievances.

Solve the problem

This technique is considered the most challenging because if you manage to solve it, anger becomes irrelevant. Generally, anger doesn’t arise without cause. Our culture advocates for resilience, which isn’t always practical. We’re often told every problem has a solution, yet that’s not always true. What do you do when a solution eludes you?

This dilemma leads to finding your own method of resolution, which may diverge from others’ advice or expectations, as what works for one may not suit another. Finding tranquility amidst turmoil could be the key to resolving issues.

There are numerous strategies to mitigate anger, and these are just a few that some find effective. Personally, I’m not inclined towards these methods for reasons of my own.

Following are the techniques that consistently work for me.

HOW DO I OVERCOME ANGER?

Now it’s my turn. I tend to get angry quite quickly, more so than you might assume, whether you’re familiar with my work or know me beyond this digital platform. However, I have developed methods to manage my anger. Here are some personal tips and tricks, although I’m not certain they will be effective for you on a personal level.

Avoiding Anger

The old adage “prevention is better than cure” resonates with me, particularly when it comes to managing anger. Once anger takes hold, it often escalates quickly before we realize it’s happening.

Therefore, the most effective strategy is to prevent anger altogether. However, this approach might not be suitable for everyone, given our unique dispositions.

To keep anger at bay, I make a conscious effort to listen more than I speak, especially in group settings. This aligns with my introverted tendencies. By being mindful of our words, we can reduce the frequency of anger, provided we have the discipline to do so.

Quick Repentance

Even when I am certain of my correctness, I choose peace and promptly apologize if I sense someone’s annoyance due to my actions or words. Experience has taught me that we reap what we sow. Insisting on being right only leads to mutual defensiveness and endless conflict.

This approach is deeply personal, which is why I identify with the name ‘Shalom.’ I’ve long realized that valuing peace and harmony above my own interests is beneficial for both myself and those around me. It may be the most challenging method to manage anger, but it has worked wonders for me.

Withdrawal

If I cannot prevent it or if the other person does not accept my sincere apologies, my last resort for managing anger is to withdraw. I distance myself from the person or situation for a while to cool down before I become too upset.

For instance, if I am upset with my wife, I might take a walk in nature or simply stay out of her sight for some time. This approach may not always be beneficial for her because withdrawal can be particularly hurtful to women, but it is my method for calming down.

It is natural and positive that women and girls are emotional rather than purely rational (I have recently realized that some men are as emotional as women, so it is not a matter of gender but of personality). A woman who does not possess these qualities may struggle to connect with a man, her husband, potentially leading to significant marital problems.

In my region, employing the withdrawal technique is often viewed as cowardice. However, I have utilized it since childhood. The issue with this approach is the general lack of understanding. Withdrawing from someone does not signify fear; it indicates a desire to avoid escalating anger to a boiling point. We are advised to manage our anger promptly, and distancing oneself from the source of irritation is the most effective method.

YOU HAVE A PERSONAL CHOICE

I’ve shared various techniques that others and I use to prevent or manage anger. However, as an individual, you possess unique methods of thinking, speaking, and addressing issues like anger. By now, you’ve understood what anger entails and the appropriate times to address it. I’ve presented my perspective on the positives and negatives of the subject. Now, it’s your opportunity to assess my writings and express your opinions. You might concur with certain aspects and differ on others. Regardless, you are in control of your own thoughts and actions.

MY FINAL WORDS

I always strive to be open-minded, which is why I value your input on everything I share. My parting advice is to explore various methods for managing anger in your life. Once you discover an effective strategy, adhere to it as much as possible.

I trust this article has been beneficial to you. If it has, please feel free to share it with others via the social sharing buttons provided. Your comments are welcome; they will help me improve future articles. May God bless you abundantly and protect you during and beyond the global pandemic. Let’s stay connected on WhatsApp; you can reach out to me using the button below. Shalom!