TL;DR
We are raising children in a world where screens flash, apps beep, and attention breaks into small pieces. Yet it is still possible to raise children with purpose. In fact, it is more urgent than ever. Purpose is the reason behind their choices, the quiet voice that says, “My life matters,” even when social media is shouting louder.
I grew up in villages along the Sobat River with no tablets or cartoons, but with other distractions: war, hunger, and fear. My father, Maluth, did not have parenting books. He had a broom, a spear, and a strong sense of responsibility.
He taught me that every small task was practice for a larger calling. Now, as I watch nephews and nieces glued to screens in Juba, I know the tools have changed, but the assignment for parents remains the same: help children live with purpose, not just entertainment.
The New Challenge: Childhood In An Age Of Noise
If you have tried speaking to a child while a cartoon screams on a tablet, you know this scene. You pour out wisdom about honesty or hard work. The child nods without listening, then suddenly says, “Wait, my character just leveled up.” Your words float away while pixels win their attention.
In my childhood, our distractions were simple. A group of boys playing by the river. Stories at the fire. The temptation to ignore chores and go fishing. Today, distraction sits in every pocket. It vibrates. It flashes. It never gets tired.
Parenting has always been difficult, but now the competition for your child’s heart and mind includes multinational companies, social platforms, and endless video streams. That can feel frightening, but it is not hopeless. Noise can be loud, but purpose still speaks if we help our children tune their ears.
What Distraction Really Is
Distraction is not new. My grandmother used to say even cows forget where they are going when they see greener grass. The modern difference is speed and volume.
In the village, a distraction came as a friend calling your name across the field. Today, it comes as hundreds of notifications. YouTube, TikTok, games, messages. Each one says, “Look at me now.”
If we are not careful, our children grow up with a mind that jumps every few seconds. Instead of focusing on one meaningful task, they develop a habit of chasing the next small pleasure. They are busy, but not directed. Active, but not anchored.
I often tell myself: distraction is not just about screens stealing time. It is about screens stealing attention from the questions that matter. Who am I? Why am I here? What kind of person do I want to become?
Purpose: The Compass In The Noise
Purpose is simply the “why” behind the “what.” It is the reason a child wakes up, studies, works, helps, and dreams.
Without purpose, a child drifts. They follow trends, not convictions. They copy what they see, without asking if it is right.
With purpose, a child can sit in the same digital world as everyone else but use it differently. They can treat a phone as a tool, not a master.
Raising children with purpose is not about making them hate technology. It is about teaching them that life is bigger than likes, followers, and game levels. It is reminding them that being known online is not the same as being useful and kind in real life.
My Father’s Quiet Lessons In Purpose
My father never gave me a written mission statement. He gave me a broom and a standard.
One afternoon, when I was young, the compound needed cleaning. I wanted to rush through it and go play. I dragged the broom lazily, leaving small islands of dust everywhere. My father watched quietly for a while, then called me.
He said, “If you cannot sweep the compound well, how will you ever lead people?”
At that age, leadership was far from my mind. I just wanted to finish quickly. But his sentence stayed with me. Years later, when I faced responsibilities in church, in organizations, or in writing, that line came back. Sweeping was not only about dust. It was about character.
During the war years, when we moved, hid, and survived on very little, my parents still forced purpose into those hard days. They reminded me that even in chaos, I could choose how to behave. I could complain or help. I could become bitter or become useful. They did not use the word “purpose,” but they lived it.
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Parenting In The Wi Fi Era: Practical Steps
Today, we are not just facing laziness. We are facing glowing screens that have studied human attention better than most parents have. So how do we raise children with purpose in this environment?
5.1 Model purpose
Children watch more than they listen. If they see you drifting through your own life, scrolling endlessly, complaining without changing, they will copy that. If they see you working toward clear goals, serving others, and using your phone as a tool, they will notice.
Ask yourself: would I want my child to live the way I am living?
5.2 Limit screens instead of banning them
Technology is not the enemy. It becomes a problem when it is unplanned and unmanaged. Set clear times for screens and times without them. Encourage content that teaches skills, creativity, or language, not only mindless clips. The goal is to put screens under purpose, not purpose under screens.
5.3 Encourage questions
Children with purpose ask “why.” Why do we pray? Why do I study? Why should I tell the truth? Answer those questions, even when you are tired. If you do not answer, someone on the internet will, and you may not like their answer.
5.4 Connect them to their roots
Stories, songs, sayings, and traditions help children know where they come from. When a child knows their people’s struggles and victories, they sense that they are part of a much bigger story. That feeling of belonging supports purpose.
5.5 Celebrate effort, not only results
When a child studies hard, helps someone, or keeps a promise, praise the effort even if the result is not perfect. Purpose is built on character, not just medals and certificates. Teach them that growth matters more than applause.
A Story From My Nephew: Wisdom Versus “Game Loading”
Once, I tried to teach my nephew about discipline. I was serious. I prepared a kind of mini sermon in my mind. I sat him down and started talking about time, responsibility, and self-control.
Right in the middle of my deep words, he raised his hand like a student and said, “Uncle, can you pause? My game is loading.”
For a moment, I did not know whether to laugh or cry. Here I was sweating with wisdom, and there he was thinking about cartoon characters and points.
But that small moment taught me something. Children are not always resisting truth. Many times, they are just pulled in several directions at once. Their minds are busy. Their games are designed to grab attention. As adults, we need patience and humor to pull them back gently.
If we respond only with anger, we push them deeper into their digital world. If we respond with calm firmness and even some laughter, we have a better chance to connect.
The Enemies Of Purpose
There are several quiet enemies that fight purpose in a child’s life today.
- Comparison
Children see “perfect” lives online: perfect bodies, houses, holidays. They start to feel small and useless. Instead of asking, “What is my purpose?” they ask, “Why am I not like them?” That kills self-worth. - Busyness
Children can be overloaded with activities: school, homework, chores, games, groups. Being busy is not the same as being purposeful. Even a hamster runs a lot but stays in the same cage. - Neglect
If parents are always on their own phones, always too tired to talk, children learn that nobody has time for their questions. A parent who drifts raises children who drift. You cannot preach purpose while scrolling without limits yourself. - Pain and hopelessness
In places like South Sudan, children see conflict, poverty, and broken promises. They may think, “What is the point of dreaming?” Without hope, purpose dries up. Parents and elders need to plant hope by sharing honest stories of survival and change, including their own.
My Hope For South Sudanese Families
When I look at South Sudan, I do not only see oil, politics, or peace agreements. I see children.
I see a boy in a village who could become a doctor if he believes his mind matters.
I see a girl in a camp who could become an engineer or a poet if she believes her story is not finished.
I see many children who could become leaders who love peace more than war, if their homes teach them that their lives are more than tribal grudges or survival.
This dream will not come from screens. It will not come only from schools. It will come from homes where parents, guardians, and elders take time to speak purpose into small hearts, even when those hearts are distracted.
A Final Story: The YouTuber Dream
Not long ago, I asked a group of children, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Some said doctors. Some said teachers. One boy shouted with full confidence, “I want to be a YouTuber.”
Everyone laughed. I laughed too. My first reaction was to think, “These children and their internet dreams.”
Then I stopped myself.
I thought, “If this boy becomes a YouTuber who teaches, encourages, spreads truth, or shares helpful skills, is that less valuable than my generation’s dreams?” Purpose does not mean copying old jobs. It means filling any work with meaning and service.
Our job as adults is not to fight every new dream. It is to ask, “Why?”
Why YouTube? Why medicine? Why teaching?
If the answer is only “money” or “fame,” then we guide. If the answer grows into “serving, educating, healing, lifting others,” then we support.
Purpose is not about dragging children back to our past. It is about walking with them as they carry meaning into their future.
If you would like to know more about my path as a writer, including the struggles, lessons, and small signs of progress along the way, you can read the full story on my Wealthy Affiliate blog here: https://my.wealthyaffiliate.com/johnmaluth/blog
Reflection Questions
- How do you balance technology in your child’s life so that it becomes a tool, not a master?
- What small lessons from your own childhood quietly shaped your sense of purpose?
- When your children watch your daily habits, do they see a person with direction, or someone who is also drifting?
- How can you use your stories, songs, and traditions to remind children that they are part of a larger story than social media?
- If your child writes an autobiography one day, what purpose would you hope they say you passed down to them?
FAQS
- Should I completely ban screens if I want my child to live with purpose?
No. You do not need to ban screens, but you should guide and limit them. Set clear times and types of content. Teach your child that screens must serve learning, creativity, and healthy rest, not replace real life. - How can I teach purpose if I still feel unclear about my own?
Start where you are. Be honest with your child that you are also learning. Choose one or two values, like honesty and hard work, and live them consistently. As you grow in clarity, share that journey with your child. - What do I do if my child only cares about games and social media?
Begin by listening. Ask what they enjoy about those games or platforms. Then slowly connect their interests to real life skills and responsibilities. Combine limits with alternatives: sports, reading, practical tasks, and quality time together. - How can culture and tradition help in raising purposeful children?
Culture offers stories, rituals, and sayings that connect children to their roots. When you explain the meaning behind proverbs, songs, and ceremonies, you give children a sense of identity and duty that goes beyond entertainment. - Is it wrong if my child wants a modern dream, like being a YouTuber or influencer?
Not necessarily. The key is the reason behind the dream. Talk with them about what they want to share with the world and who they want to help. Guide them to choose meaning, truth, and service over empty popularity.
